My alcoholic ex-boyfriend is stalking me…
DEAR ABBY: A former boyfriend, “Ray,” is an alcoholic. He has been through rehab twice, but it didn’t do any good. He gained’t stop. He retains saying we’ll work it out.
I don’t perceive why Ray can’t get it through his head that I no longer need to be with him. I gave him two possibilities. Nobody else needs to help him either, including his household.
Ray will be controlling. He still contacts me and tells me what I need to do, just like when we have been together. I don’t need that type of particular person in my life. I hope and pray God will ship me the fitting particular person in the future. Any advice you may offer? — BREAKING AWAY IN ALABAMA
DEAR BREAKING AWAY: Block Ray’s quantity, and don’t reply to any more messages from him. If he has a key to your house, change the locks. The next time Ray contacts you (hopefully sober), inform him there is nothing more to work out. You no longer need any contact with him, and if his stalking doesn’t stop, you’ll report him to the authorities and get a restraining order. (Then, if it turns into obligatory, do it.)
DEAR ABBY: My sister “Fiora” lives with her daughter and household a number of states away from me and her other siblings. She is insisting we plan a occasion for her eightieth birthday. Fiora needs it to be a vacation spot occasion in an costly resort space nowhere close to where any of us live.
None of us is rich, but some of us have been good money managers and are comfy in retirement. Fiora, on the other hand, has spent every last dime and has health points, so she must live with her daughter. We have told her we really feel if she needs this extravagant occasion, she ought to discuss to her youngsters, not to us. Is this unreasonable of us or of her? — PARTIED OUT IN MISSOURI
DEAR PARTIED OUT: Putting the principles of etiquette apart, Sister Fiora shouldn’t be demanding that her siblings foot the invoice for a birthday extravaganza she will be able to’t afford. Tell her (as one) that you can be glad to cut up the invoice for a more modest celebration or ship her a examine. The selection is hers, and the quantity is one thing all the sibs can determine upon. Her grownup youngsters may also need to chip in as properly.
DEAR ABBY: Has anybody ever requested ladies on the receiving end of males’s use of Viagra or other such drugs how they really feel about having to plan or schedule their so-called “lovemaking”? I really feel it could make it just plain previous intercourse somewhat than an emotional, loving act. To me, it could be better to have no intercourse at all than to have to plan for it. Also, how satisfying is it actually to ladies? — PHYLLIS IN INDIANA
DEAR PHYLLIS: As I’m sure you recognize, there is more to making love than popping a tablet. The act and the will for it ought to be mutual somewhat than a efficiency. Making love with somebody a particular person cares about and is attracted to will be satisfying, but I feel the reply to your query relies upon upon which participant you ask.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also recognized as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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