Taylor Swift has a tacky MSG wedding and Madonna…
We live in unusual and complicated instances.
Up is down. Day is evening. Madonna is acclaimed. Taylor Swift is a circus act.
It’s a veritable pop bizarro world.
On Friday, 67-year-old Madge stunned everyone by releasing her first good album in 21 years, “Confessions II,” after a long string of clunkers and tasteless, embarrassing stunts.
Madonna launched a improbable new album. GC Images
The report has rolled in like a prayer. During a sweltering summer season that’s been depressingly gentle on contemporary dance-floor hits, we finally received some rhapsodic ones from a star who’s been with us for more than 4 a long time.
And then, spookily on that very same day, 36-year-old Taylor wedded Travis Kelce at a small and unassuming venue called Madison Square Garden — an object lesson in tackiness.
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The day of Madge and Tay’s abrupt switcheroo will henceforth be identified as Freaky Friday.
When Page Six broke the surprising news of Taylor’s diabolical wedding plan back in April, followers have been in complete disbelief. How might she probably do this? A Swiftie pal at a rival publication told me, “That’s not happening.” Well, it did. And no one, save for the wealthy and highly effective company, could be very pleased about it.
Why would they be? Streets next to Penn Station, the busiest transit hub in North America, have been blocked off for two days for a non-public movie star marriage attended by 1,000 or so of the couple’s closest associates and wealthiest benefactors.
Madonna used to be the Queen of Attention Grabs. Best Image / BACKGRID
And more than 100 NYPD cops (that Swift reportedly can pay for) have been diverted to her nuptials on a weekend when hordes of New Yorkers set off explosives in the street while binge ingesting. Gee, thanks!
Reports on the decor diversified. Some said the couple was building a fortress inside of MSG. Others said, no, no, no, they’re creating a garden! I say, eh, it’s garish all the same.
And yet up until now, music’s reigning Queen of Tawdry Displays had been Madonna.
Remember three years in the past when Madge launched a piece of digital artwork depicting a tree grossly rising from her, uh, materials lady?
Or the time during the 2016 Rebel Heart tour when she went on unhinged rants and ordered two Cosmopolitans to the stage?
Obviously, there’s the pileup of twenty-something boyfriends and her uncomfortable, Quixotic obsession with youth.
After the wedding, the indicators exterior MSG blared: “JUST&T MARRIED.” Getty Images for TAS Rights Management
But the numerous determined consideration grabs fade into the background when Madonna releases improbable music. That’s what the people need, not a bizarre descent into Madgeness. Her latest album, appropriately her best since 2025’s “Confessions On A Dancefloor,” has some infectious tunes, particularly “Danceteria,” “Love Sensation” and “Bring Your Love.”
At nearly 70 years previous, she’s still received it.
Meanwhile back in the pungent cesspit of Midtown on Friday evening, the indicators exterior MSG blared: “JUST&T MARRIED,” just like the Taylor and Travis suppose they’re the romantic equal of the Knicks and needed a standing ovation from the sweaty plebs exterior their fortress of elitism.
How stunningly out of contact they’re.
Madonna, however, is back in Vogue. The singer first moved to New York from Detroit in 1978 and it’s right here where she broke out into the music industry.
You can hear town and that decade’s affect on her new songs — notably “Danceteria.”
Madonna is a true New Yorker, and there’s something I do know that even she would never, ever do: Get married at Madison Square Garden.
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