My sister is trashing our parents memories with…
DEAR ABBY: My sister has always been a liar and a manipulator. She has misplaced jobs because of her poisonous habits. Our parents handed away 20 years in the past, and ever since, she has trashed their reminiscence to anybody who will pay attention. She claims she was undesirable because she was feminine, that my parents refused to title her, and wouldn’t take her home from the hospital until police had been called. None of that is in any method true.
Now, she’s claiming our mom slept with a number of males, and my organic father may very well be almost anybody. I’ve a DNA take a look at that proves that my father was the person who was married to my mom for more than 50 years. She dismisses this proof as a “lab mistake” and maintains her story about my parentage.
How do I reply to this? Do I contact members of our large prolonged household and inform them what she is doing? I suspect that what she desires is a response from me, which she is going to then weaponize against me as she often does. How do I deal with such a liar, who has no concern for the impression of her allegations? — FRUSTRATED BROTHER IN TENNESSEE
DEAR BROTHER: Your sister seems to be mentally unbalanced and unwilling to settle for you as her full brother. She might also be making an attempt to upset you.
If you assume she has been spreading these rumors among your kin, by all means, attain out and inform them you’ve got proof that what she has been saying is unfaithful. One can only think about what else she has been mendacity about.
DEAR ABBY: A close relative has been recognized with incurable cancer. Friends are now sending me articles and clippings about cancer research and the promise of new therapies. If that they had truly read these articles, they’d see that scientific trials on people are far off, or that the sort of cancer referred to in the article is different from what my relative has.
Why offer hope when there is none? The same factor occurred to me when I had cancer 20 years in the past. In one occasion, I acquired an article about how to stop the cancer I already had!
Please remind your readers that although these objects are most often despatched with love, they do little to help the person experiencing the sickness and treatment and may cause anger and pain. Doctors, particularly oncologists, present their sufferers with the best remedies obtainable. It’s best to allow them to deal with it. Thank you. — SAD RELATIVE IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR RELATIVE: Many people, upon listening to that somebody they care about has a terminal sickness, really feel unhappy and helpless. Out of a need to do one thing, they are going to ship articles, some of that are inappropriate.
While I agree that the most dependable source of info about cancer is your relative’s oncologist, and that readers need to remember of the message they’re making an attempt to ship, please perceive they’re being despatched out of a want to help.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also recognized as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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