My boyfriend hosts his ex-wife and her friend…
DEAR ABBY: My longtime boyfriend has been divorced for more than 20 years. Every yr, his ex comes to keep at his home for a week or two and brings along another feminine friend. He caters to them, driving them around and entertaining them at eating places, and many others.
I’m never included, even though I’ve expressed an curiosity in doing so.
Am I fallacious in considering this is disrespectful to me and for feeling resentful over having never been launched to his annual houseguests? I embody him when I’ve houseguests. — LEFT OUT IN FLORIDA
DEAR LEFT OUT: Your longtime boyfriend is performing like you might be his guilty secret quite than his girl friend. (Is his ex conscious that he has a girlfriend?) I can’t blame you for feeling disrespected and excluded.
Because this is an annual event, it could be time to contemplate taking a trip of your own during the time your boyfriend will probably be AWOL.
DEAR ABBY: I’m 76 and live in a great neighborhood. However, there are nearly as many canines as there are homes. As a outcome, many of them are walked by my home at least twice a day. I like to go for walks in my neighborhood, but I’m afraid of canine.
If I meet somebody strolling their canine, they often need me to pet their canine. If I inform them I’m afraid of canine, they often say I shouldn’t fear because their canine is pleasant and would quite lick me than hurt me. However, I don’t need to be licked either.
I’ve tried timing my walks to keep away from these encounters, and I don’t need to drive elsewhere and waste fuel to go for a stroll. Suggestions, please. — SOLITARY STROLLER IN THE EAST
DEAR STROLLER: I do have a suggestion for you. Smile at the canine walkers and keep strolling. That manner, you’ll project friendliness but received’t be pressured into an prolonged encounter that is disagreeable for you. It’s no sin to not need a licking.
DEAR ABBY: How do I ratchet down gift-giving? I’m 80 years outdated. I’ve just about every part I would like and far more than I need.
Yet, I’ve a daughter-in-law and a sister-in-law who lavish me with a half dozen or more items each vacation and birthday — books I can’t read, garments I can’t put on, gadgets I already have. All of them are new and not cheap.
I don’t want to trigger a schism. Any recommendations on how to method these girls to recommend that, while it’s good to be remembered, one is enough? — STUFFED WITH STUFF IN MASSACHUSETTS
DEAR STUFFED: Talk to your daughter-in-law and sister-in-law individually. Tell them how grateful (and touched) you might be that they’re so beneficiant with you, but clarify that it’s inflicting a downside.
You no longer have space for more issues and, if they really feel they must provide you with birthday and vacation items, you’d recognize it if they might donate the money to a charity of your selecting. It’s sincere, and I’m sure the funds could be welcomed.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also identified as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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